writethoughts

say that you love me... not.

When love comes knocking on your door, you either grab the opportunity or let it slip, forever. This is a story of two people searching for love, never knowing it was always right in front of them.

1992. They were both members of their school band. Being in elementary school, boys only spoke to boys and girls only spoke to girls.

They both went on to different high schools. He studied in a prestigious east-side school while she studied in a neighbourhood school, often known by others as ‘that ahbeng school that appeared on the news’.

Throughout the years of high school, they occasionally bumped into each other but never said anything more than “eh you were from my primary school right? hi!”. She had a few relationships, he had more than a few.

Tertiary life came and left. By now, he’d fully grown into a man with a body which boasted his frequent gym trips. She didn’t look too bad herself, having been blessed with a petite frame and a smile that’d won the hearts of many. By now, they were also closer, perhaps not that close, friends who met up for coffee every once in awhile.

One random day, a random message let to a random night out together, which ended with a very random, but tender kiss on the lips. It instantly brought to her heart bolts of electricity that set her heart beating furiously. He pulled back, feeling nervous suddenly…

And then everything went back to the way they used to be. He led his own life and she led hers, with the usual occasional exchange of Hi’s with one another.

She thought about the kiss ever so often; he found images of her in his head unknowingly. But neither mentioned the incident to each other, or anyone else for it just didn’t seem like it was the right thing. 

So they both went in search of the next chance to feel what they felt that night again.

No you did not!

He saw her the moment she boarded the train at Raffles Place Station. The confidence she exuded as she walked in turned the heads of a couple more men.

She was beautiful. Long, silky black hair that complemented her almond-shaped eyes flowed down her slender back; she was clad in an LBD and a pair of Nine West. She seemed slightly familiar but he could not quite put a name to her face. He had to take action.

He ran his fingers through his hair, silently cursing himself for not styling it that morning.

“Buona Vista”

Ms LBD stepped out of the train. He followed suit and stopped her like a Citibank salesman would a passer-by.

“Hi, I couldn’t help noticing you in the train. I don’t mean to be rude, but you seem to resemble someone I know. Have we met somewhere? I’m Dan.”

The lady stared at him for awhile before she opened her mouth. “I remember you now. Aren’t you the guy who openly read Elizabeth’s love letter to you in the school canteen? The sec 4 & 5 guys were laughing when you said you’d never date a pig like her.”

It took Dan 5 seconds to recall that episode that happened in his secondary school 8 years back. He gave a sheepish smile. “Yeah, that was me. I had to get that girl off my back then; she had really awful teeth and scared me off. So, we have met after all. What’s your name?”

“Elizabeth.”

for Auld Lang Syne

Dylan says:
Maybe we should meet up.

Caryn says:
We should.

He was the party of all parties; she carried with her a sense of beauty and fun everywhere she went.

In the eyes of their friends, they were seen as, cliché as it sounds, The Golden Couple. They often completed each other’s sentences; that’s how much chemistry they had between each other. D & C were seen everywhere, from getting CK undies, to Jenny’s 21st party, to Ah ma’s birthday dinner.

Alas, the relationship was not made to last. She could tell from his changes of behaviour that he wasn’t ready or going to commit. After 10 months, he threw in the white towel; the bomb on Caryn. “You are a wonderful woman who came into my life at the wrong time, baby. I’m sorry.” She read the SMS, and returned, to the food display rack, the packet of California Raisins she was getting him.

“He’s never loved me,” she cried into the arms of her best friend by the playground they always sat at.
“He loves you, more than he does a friend, but less than he would a lover. It sucks to be in such a position, I know, but take consolation in the fact that he does care for you, dear.”

Surprisingly, given the size of Singapore and limited places one could patronize, it took 4 years before their paths finally crossed. He, although without the glow his big eyes used to have, still looked as smart as ever. She looked a lot paler, and at least 15kg lighter. When their eyes met for the first time in years, the sparks appeared again, as if the feelings were never gone. Her heart skipped a beat as she wondered if she was hallucinating.

After exchanging longer-than-usual hellos, they left in opposite directions. Upon turning around, he grinned to himself. “I’ve gotta call her out for dinner tomorrow – no, make that next week or I’ll seem too desperate.” On her side, a contented smile formed on her face.

Deep in their hearts, much as they hadn’t realized, was love that was still lingering on. That night, she removed her wig, lay in bed, and succumbed to the cancer that she’d been fighting for the past year. Closure, she’d found at last.